VOWS OF SHAME - Namasté

 




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I DOx3 DESERT EDITION

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  Statement prepared and read by Hazel Nuss, Independent Legal Counsel and Unbiased, Incorruptible Witness to the Newlyweds In the heart of the arid Desert, where ancient secrets whisper with the wind, an extraordinary… union  unfolds. ( we can say union, the word is legally accurate. ) Kunto, Letizia, and Olimpia have you come together? — by your own choice? — agreeing on a mutually beneficial pact that will, with some luck, not end in blood, scandal, or spontaneous duels?  (Letizia might still consider them a bonus and say ''no'') In this  celebration of chaos, passion, and unbreakable bonds, today these three defy convention, pledging their lives together once again amidst swirling sands and mysterious coffee beans rites. This triad vows not only —" ( Hazel pauses dramatically, then furtively spells out the word 'love' in sign language, glancing sideways to make sure Letizia isn’t watching ) "— but also survival in a world as unpredictable a...
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OPERATION SURPRISE (ALMOST SUCCESSFUL)

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Tatiana had one job: surprise Hazel. Not rocket science. Just show up unannounced, kiss her wife, win all the points. To plan it, she contacted Green. Innocently. Strategically. “I am comiiiiiiiiiing,” she texted, hoping to coordinate behind Hazel’s back. But alas... not all secret missions survive the Green filter. Green, in a moment of pure cosmic confusion (24/7) and distracted by thoughts of another woman with a similar name, replied with absolute enthusiasm: “Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh faster .... finally I can kiss my bitch!” Oops. Realizing the accidental exposure, Green’s meltdown was swift and theatrical: “Oh no... what have I done?! I replied to you by mistake,?! Hazel's going to kill me, I just know it. It wasn’t on purpose, it was just... enthusiasm! Please, don’t tell her—no wait, you already did, didn’t you? I’m doomed. Tell her I’m sorry. Deeply sorry. Also... still laughing. But in fear!” Tati’s dry reply? “I only wrote to you so you wouldn’t tell Hazel abo...
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WHEN STORMS BRING TROUBLES - A NEW SHELTER FOR GREEN

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  Kunto had returned home with all the grace of a stray cat who’d just discovered he now owned two food bowls, a luxury couch, and a shared wife. On paper, the three-way marriage with Letizia and Olimpia looked like a shimmering beacon of modern, enlightened polyamory. It wasn’t new territory — back in the day, Kunto, Olimpia, and Letizia had played a civilized game of “if I don’t see it, it doesn’t exist.” But after months away, the chill, do-whatever-you-want husband was no more. While dodging international chaos, Kunto kept one eye glued to scandal blogs. Every time he saw “Letizia,” “Olimpia,” and “unexplained noises” in the same headline, he aged five years. His imagination filled in the rest — always with him missing out. And now that he was back, the jealous worm in his chest had grown teeth. So, on one of those window-rattling stormy nights, Green Peace — as usual — had taken shelter in the warmest place available: Olimpia’s thighs. [Backstage,  some days before the ce...
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